{"id":1494,"date":"2025-01-21T16:56:38","date_gmt":"2025-01-21T14:26:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/liispaemurru.com\/?p=1494"},"modified":"2025-03-11T12:19:58","modified_gmt":"2025-03-11T09:49:58","slug":"aga-miks-peaks-uldse-kuulama","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/liispaemurru.com\/en\/aga-miks-peaks-uldse-kuulama\/","title":{"rendered":"4 nippi, kuidas p\u00e4riselt kah! kuulata"},"content":{"rendered":"

Kuulamine tundub marulihtne. Me k\u00f5ik teeme seda iga p\u00e4ev \u2013 v\u00f5i v\u00e4hemalt arvame, et teeme. Kas ikka teeme? Kas m\u00e4letad, mida r\u00e4\u00e4kisid hommikul oma kaaslase v\u00f5i lastega? Kas m\u00e4letad, milline oli nende emotsioon, kehakeel, k\u00f5nemaneer? Proovi seda j\u00e4rgmisel korral teadlikult m\u00e4rgata. Tihti juhtub, et kuigi keegi r\u00e4\u00e4gib, r\u00e4ndab meie m\u00f5te samal ajal siiski mujale: kiired t\u00f6\u00f6asjad; mida \u00f5htul s\u00fc\u00fca teha; mida s\u00f5ber eile mulle \u00fctles; unistused jne. Ja enamasti, kui kaaslane r\u00e4\u00e4gib, m\u00f5tleme sellele, mida ise tahame \u00f6elda. Aga mis siis k\u00f5igel sellel viga on?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hea kuulamine ei ole lihtsalt viisakus – see on \u00fcks olulisemaid oskusi tugevate koost\u00f6\u00f6suhete ja usalduse loomiseks.<\/strong> Kui inimene tunneb, et teda on p\u00e4riselt kuulatud, siis:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2705 Ta on avatum jagama oma m\u00f5tteid ja tundeid
\u2705 Pinged ja konfliktid lahenevad kiiremini, sest k\u00f5ik osapooled tunnevad end m\u00f5istetuna
\u2705 Koost\u00f6\u00f6 paraneb \u2013 meeskonnad, kus kuulamine on osa kultuurist, on t\u00f5husamad ja loovad paremaid tulemusi
\u2705 Inimesed tunnevad end v\u00e4\u00e4rtustatuna ja emotsionaalselt turvalisemalt<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kujuta ette, et r\u00e4\u00e4gid kellegagi, kes sind p\u00e4riselt kuulab \u2013 ilma katkestamata, ilma kohe oma arvamust lisamata, lihtsalt kohal olles. See tunne loob usalduse, rahustab ja tugevdab suhet.<\/strong> Kuulamine ei t\u00e4henda ainult info vastu v\u00f5tmist, vaid ka teise inimese m\u00f5istmist ja tema v\u00e4\u00e4rtustamist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Miks mitte proovida allj\u00e4rgnevat viite nippi, et ise see parem kuulaja olla.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1. Peegelduse j\u00f5ud<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

\u00dcks olulisi esimesi v\u00f5tmeoskusi on peegeldamine<\/strong> \u2013 see t\u00e4hendab, et kordad v\u00f5i parafraseerid vestluskaaslase \u00f6eldut, et ta tunneks end kuulatuna ja m\u00f5istetuna. N\u00e4iteks:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udde3 “Sa tunned, et su t\u00f6\u00f6koormus on viimasel ajal liiga suur ja see tekitab stressi?”<\/strong> v\u00f5i “Kas ma sain sinust \u00f5igesti aru, et …”<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Miks see t\u00f6\u00f6tab? Peegeldamine aitab teisel inimesel oma tundeid selgemalt m\u00f5ista ja loob turvalise ruumi jagamiseks. Samuti v\u00e4hendab see kiusatust anda kohe lahendusi v\u00f5i oma arvamust peale suruda.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kui sa pole varem peegeldamistehnikaid kasutanud, siis v\u00f5id esialgu proovida seda n\u00e4iteks oma kaaslase v\u00f5i hea s\u00f5bra peal, kasv\u00f5i naljatledes ja las tema proovib ka – vaadake, kuidas tundub! Ja siit edasi, kui asi k\u00e4ppa saab, saad j\u00e4rk-j\u00e4rgult selle oma koost\u00f6\u00f6suhete pagasisse lisada.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2. \u00c4ra oota oma j\u00e4rjekorda vastata – lihtsalt kuula<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Sageli kuulame kellegi juttu ainult selleks, et oodata oma v\u00f5imalust r\u00e4\u00e4kida<\/strong> v\u00f5i vahepeal peas vastust koostada. Selleks, et t\u00f5estada vastupidist v\u00f5i domineerida oma arvamusega. Selle asemel proovi teadlikult keskenduda hetkele. K\u00fcsi endalt:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udc49 “Kas ma p\u00e4riselt kuulan v\u00f5i lihtsalt ootan oma korda r\u00e4\u00e4kida?”<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kui tabad end oma m\u00f5tetes uitamas, too oma t\u00e4helepanu teadlikult tagasi vestlusesse. K\u00f5ige lihtsam on korra s\u00fcgavalt sisse-v\u00e4lja hingata v\u00f5i kiirel peas tagurpidi numbreid kolmest \u00fcheni lugeda. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

3. Keha r\u00e4\u00e4gib veel rohkemgi kui s\u00f5nad<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

S\u00f5nad moodustavad vaid osa suhtlusest \u2013 kehakeel, h\u00e4\u00e4letoon ja silmside m\u00e4ngivad veel suuremat rolli. Kas m\u00e4letad, kui said oma ema-isa k\u00e4est pahandada v\u00f5i keegi teine t\u00f5reles – meelde j\u00e4\u00e4b vaid emotsioon, isegi kui emotsiooni taga oli p\u00e4ris mure. Kui soovid tegelikult ka kuulata, siis kasuta avatud kehakeelt:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2705 Vaata vestluskaaslase poole (ilma \u00fchegi nutividinata)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2705 Nooguta v\u00f5i \u00fctle vaikselt “mh-hm” – oled kohal<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2705 V\u00e4ldi risti k\u00e4si, hoia keha r\u00e4\u00e4kija poole<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2705Peegelda teise inimese emotsioone \u2013 kui ta r\u00e4\u00e4gib r\u00f5\u00f5msalt, lase oma n\u00e4ol seda peegeldada; kui ta r\u00e4\u00e4gib millestki raskest – ole tema tunnetega koosk\u00f5las<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2705<\/strong>Praktiseeri eneseteadlikkust: P\u00f6\u00f6ra t\u00e4helepanu omaenda m\u00f5tetele ja hinnangutele, mis v\u00f5ivad vestlust segada.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \n
  1. <\/li>\n<\/ol>\n\n\n\n

    4. K\u00fcsi k\u00fcsimusi, mis viivad s\u00fcgavamale<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

    S\u00fcgavad k\u00fcsimused aitavad avada m\u00f5tteid ja n\u00e4idata, et oled p\u00e4riselt vestlusega kaasas. Need panevad m\u00f5tlema ja viivad arutelud j\u00e4rgmisele tasandile, v\u00f5imaldades vastata midagi rohkem, kui “ei” v\u00f5i “jah.” Selle asemel, et k\u00fcsida “Kas sul oli t\u00e4na t\u00f6\u00f6l kiire?<\/strong>“, proovi midagi avatumat:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \ud83d\udcac “Mis oli t\u00e4nases p\u00e4evas k\u00f5ige keerulisem\/m\u00f5nusam?”<\/strong>
    \ud83d\udcac “Mis pani sind nii tundma?”<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Pereteraapias kasutatakse sageli “tundepeegeldusi”<\/strong> \u2013 kui m\u00e4rkad, et keegi v\u00e4ljendab tugevat emotsiooni, aita seda s\u00f5nastada:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \ud83d\udc49 “Tundub, et see teema on sulle v\u00e4ga t\u00e4htis.”<\/strong>
    \ud83d\udc49 “See paistab sulle palju t\u00e4hendavat.”<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    See aitab teisel inimesel oma tundeid paremini m\u00f5ista ja loob s\u00fcgavama kontakti ja v\u00e4\u00e4rtuse mistahes koost\u00f6\u00f6suhtes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Kuulamine on oskus, mida teadlikult harjutada<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

    Need neli nippi tunduvad esmapilgul lihtsad ja loogilised, kuid kui palju sina neid igap\u00e4evaselt rakendad? T\u00f5eline kuulamine ei juhtu automaatselt ja kiires igap\u00e4evaelus kipub t\u00e4helepanu hajuma ja oma m\u00f5tted ettepoole tr\u00fcgima.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Nii nagu paljude teiste oskustega, on ka kuulamisoskus treenitav.<\/strong> Mida teadlikumalt seda harjutad, seda loomulikumaks see muutub. J\u00e4rgmine kord, kui keegi sinuga vestleb, proovi kas v\u00f5i \u00fchte nippi teadlikult rakendada ja vaata, kuidas see vestluse kvaliteeti muudab.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Kuulamine ei ole lihtsalt tehnika \u2013 see on viis n\u00e4idata, et teine inimene on sulle oluline. Ja mis v\u00f5iks olla veel parem kingitus kui p\u00e4riselt m\u00f5istetud olemine? \ud83c\udf81<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    <\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Kuulamine tundub marulihtne. Me k\u00f5ik teeme seda iga p\u00e4ev \u2013 v\u00f5i v\u00e4hemalt arvame, et teeme. Kas ikka teeme? Kas m\u00e4letad, mida r\u00e4\u00e4kisid hommikul oma kaaslase v\u00f5i lastega? Kas m\u00e4letad, milline oli nende emotsioon, kehakeel, k\u00f5nemaneer? Proovi seda j\u00e4rgmisel korral teadlikult m\u00e4rgata. Tihti juhtub, et kuigi keegi r\u00e4\u00e4gib, r\u00e4ndab meie m\u00f5te samal ajal siiski mujale: kiired […]<\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2711,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"disabled","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"set","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1494","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/liispaemurru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1494","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/liispaemurru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/liispaemurru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/liispaemurru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/liispaemurru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1494"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/liispaemurru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1494\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2712,"href":"https:\/\/liispaemurru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1494\/revisions\/2712"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/liispaemurru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2711"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/liispaemurru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1494"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/liispaemurru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1494"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/liispaemurru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1494"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}